Riser | Dierks Bentley

    Many time has passed, and I can still hear the voices that domains my thoughts, lashing my soul and drives my mind against me; Always hopeless, on a despair of the vanities. But in that instant, the thunder pierced the darkness to renew my soul and spirit with flames of hope.

    As the day’s pass, the same things still thorn to my heart; spine the walls of my heart, as rotten roses that I didn’t give; forgotten and lost, as everything else that fills my soul with blissful. The wrecked heartbeats are still in the same place… but I can’t feel them anyway, I can’t feel my blood tuned into sharpened ice that tears the flesh on every beat;

*White Buffalo, My Mother

     The time is running, and I’m still laying down on the floor; like a spectacular of the suffer and weakness; like a trophy of mediocrity. I can still hear, all that laughs, all that cries and all kind of sucked voices and sounds ornamented with the agony of the pain: that crushes my mind every single day on every single minute; making me wish to rip off my ears on desperation. I don’t wish to hear anything more than my Mother's* voice. I have forgotten the way… and her voice; I can’t hear her anymore.

     I can feel the Sun dimming, but it still midday; The Sun that covers dry seas and rotten gardens, is dying, making it a small white dot on the brown-copper sky,  there is no more hope; I can feel the wintriness air, there come nothing more than cold, dusk and gloom. I wish, that it comes soon, I’m tired to walk in circles, finding nothing more than hopeless words, giving nothing more than useless time. Mother will never abandon her son, even the unwise that he can be.

White Sun on the Dunes;
Source: R.S.A. Skyexplorer 

     From the yellow (East) to the black (West), with the form of the buffalo: Dark and heavy clouds are covering the horizon, with sounds of the thunder they were coming; They were coming from the Wacantognaka of Mother, As a gift to keep alive the faith and hope. From the red (North) to the white (South); The air was dense and harsh; as a lesson of Father, to test my strength (Wacintaka) every winter.

     From the distance, the thunder rolled with passion, while a great bird appeared from the flock of clouds. When the magnificent bird got out of the clouds, he flew to the zenith: gazing to the hopeless and agonizing Sun; In every wing beat, the sound of the thunder is heard. the Wakinyan (Thunderbird), I have never been so worthy to see him before, to become the Heyoka I should be; Mother considers that I’m not ready, she said that weakness always leads to a harmful behavior.

Wakinyan, The Thunderbird

     When the Thunderbird soared to a high altitude; suddenly, with the speed of the arrow, fluttered to the core of the world, making the earth of the Badlands tremble; With the bright of lightning, he pierced the darkness, crashing with the sound and form of the thunder over an old tree, Making it the center of a great circle drawn in the ground with the flares of the Sun, the flames of renewal.

     Parts of the Sun had gone down, the tree has made it a sacred pole; in the interior of the circle, between all the ashes and all the vehemence of the warmth and peace. The warm colors of the nort fulfilled my heart of calm; from a pile of dust and flamed foliage from the blazed trees, the magnificent Thunderbird, took again his form; on his penetrant black eyes, cheerful light flashes every time he open and close his eyes. With great wingspan: beautiful, vivid and colorful feathers overlayed the body of a black feathered bird with specks of vivid scarlet.

***Sundance Lodge,

     With great strength, the flutter of his wings cleaned away all the ashes and dust around us, turning the ashes into stone; by the intensity of the wind I was pushed to the Sacred Pole. I can hear the sound of the sacred pipe, Mother is close, accompanied by drums of brothers and sisters. Wakinyan is flying again to the zenith, covering the Sun. Then… The Thunderbird opened the Sky, letting come the Great Spirit (Wakan Tanka**), the primeval sound, the first light. Even with my eye-less soul, I could see it... and enjoy it.

     -“Waŋná wahí, Grandfather, I am sitting here, gazing at you (Blue); Mní blatkáŋ wačhíŋ, I am tired of being alive, here on the earth (Green)”, I said to him.

     -“I know... You never asked to be born, but you are here. As witness of your triumphs and your failures.”, Grandfather Said.

     -“With which purpose, if I win or I lose has no meaning; life only goes from yellow to black, on the end death always win”, I told to Grandfather, -“Delusion and falsehood, the happiness always plays with the mind to make us be alive in senseless permanent unsatisfaction; making us lust, greedy on a permanent wish to get more than we need on a state of swift pleasure”

     -“In life there is Sadness as well joy, bad as well as good, falling as well standing; That Teach you Reality, sometimes hidden in shadows; I have given you three eyes: A strong heart to feel compassion as same as an smallest one to be arrogant, A mind so wise to discover all of my mysteries as same as a foolish one to use it against your brothers and sisters; and a couple of terrenal eyes to enjoy all my blessings so also use them to distract your heart, mind and yoursef.”

     -“Why I must use them? you are not so strong to give it to us every time we ask for it?”

     -“Life gives you strength, You must stand up on the storm, you must face the wind; on the cold of the darkness; You must be firm.”… “Being strength, make you one more step to the top of the hill: It means to let all tears flow from the grief… It means keep looking for an answer from the darkness that despairs around you… it means to hope for one more heartbeat for one more sunrise; Each step takes you closer to the top of the hill; closer to the light of the next sunrise on a promise of a new day; appreciate yourself, and discover that there is no one else like you; Your hunger (curiosity) only make you grow into something that can put your heart in peace.”

    -“Only stronger could survive, only worthy and strong hearts can be with you; on each morning, we seek the last of our daws; as your grandchild, we seek to be part of our masters… to be part of you; I am an instrument of your joy and your peace, not a mere human accident, everything that has been designed got a purpose; as the watches are designed to show the time. Maybe we don’t see it because we didn’t design us ourself; We were designed to find your blessings and your joy; love and be loved, to pardon and be pardoned, to die into the eternal life.”

     -“All the blessing are running free around the world, and has been given...”

    -“But we must be wise and strong to gather them, and make them part of us; as the fruit that falls on the ground, to the heart who falls in love. Because darkness and pain got the purpose to lead us to the eternal bliss… I must fin the way to find your blessings, and still.”...“Grandfather, Pilamaya”...

     --- Ruben Rivera

References:

Lakota's Culture

• "Lakota's Way of Living", Joseph M. Marshall; **The most of Wakan Tanka dialogue comes from here.
• "Because God Is Real", Dr. Petter Kreeft
• "Why Bhuddism is True?", Robert Whrigth

Notes:

     The Wiwanyag Wacipi; its supposed to be on the strawberries moon (June) on the summer solstice, but the making of one post takes more time than write random notes on a notebook.

      *Its said that, two self-volunteer hunters, went to investigate some strange clouds over the hill, from the clouds, a beautiful maiden appeared; one hunter wanted to touch her lustful. So, with thunder she burned the lustful; the other hunter treated her with respect. she tell to him to return to village and announce her arrive; She has given wisdom, rituals and good behavior to the Sioux nation, also knew like "Buffalo Nation"

***The Image about the Sundance, is from Cheyene tribe, but many American Indian cultures are similar, by the common Misty Past; source: www.firstpeople.us/

Original Photo-Art by Courtney Moore (hawkeagle7), "Bald Eagle with Catch" from deviantart.com